handle it

OK, so the Finches record gets a terrible review because they're not the Animal Collective but this chucklehead gets an 8 point fucking seven! I downloaded this album and listened to it and it's just OK, pretty frenetic and annoying. This reviewer must really love xylophone and woody woodpecker samples. Carolyn said she used that review as inspiration for a song, so take that, stupid p-fork!

I'm glad the Bee is doing this series on drunk driving. It's sorely needed. I wish they would do some hard-hitting investigative stuff and send someone out to observe the zoo that is downtown on a friday and saturday night at 2 am. Maybe that's coming next. However, it's totally absurd to pretend that any bar would ever enforce the law of not serving to someone who is visibly intoxicated. Everyone is drunk in a bar unless you're watching Cheers on TV. The fault lies with the police not busting enough people for word to get out, which is probably because there aren't enough of them to do so.

Hey, Mike Dunne reviewed Cafe Vinoteca. He starts the review with a scintillating discussion of whether it's a ristorante or a trattoria. See a ristorante is...looked I've gently lulled you to sleep. How cute. I know, I know, he handles the fine dining, but who is handling everything else? And don't say Allen Pierloni, he wouldn't know how to handle an actual handle even if it came equipped with an E-Z grip handle. Ha ha, I kid! One day I'm going to run into these guys and I'll just keel over and die.