Tuesday, August 24, 2004

an opossum's best friend


monodelphis
Originally uploaded by becklerg.

I am in a very bad mood. This may have something to do with the fact that I had to get up every four hours last night to feed baby opposums (see above picture) and stimulate their genitals. Does this make me a whore? Regardless of why, I have decided that the remedy is to write something positive. So here are some reason why my new neighborhood (11th and T)rules. I will just say right off the bat that all of the people I am mentioning are Chinese. Maybe it shouldn't matter, but I feel compelled to mention it.
1) The old lady who walks around the perimeter of the elementary school across the street every night vigorously swinging her arms.
2) The old dude who chills for hours in his pajamas on his stairs, smoking.
3) The two guys down the block, one old, one younger (with a balding mullet hairstyle) who renovate and try to sell many old junker vans and are often chopping wood on the sidewalk.
4) The neighborhood electrician who the old lady downstairs summoned when D.P. blew our fuse. He had a briefcase and a faux professional air. He changed the fuse and the electrical plate for five bucks.
5) The fact that everyone has gardens in whatever tiny yard they have.

Now for something negative. The Maloofs suck it. They are not Chinese. Connection? Anyway, Anna sent me a link to a Sab BizJournal article from yesterday http://sacramento.bizjournals.com/sacramento/stories/2004/08/23/story1.html?page=1 about how the Maloofs are now generously offering to pay for 20% of the new arena. I am so tired of this issue dominating city politics. Aren't there more important things that the city could be focusing on? Like reining in the raging sexuality of our randy firemen? And even of our firemen that aren't named randy?

1 comment:

Carpetblogger said...

Why the hell are you stimulating the opossums genitalia? The next time I see (o)possums running around my neighborhood, should I give them your number? The author, Edward Hoagland, wrote some memoir about sweeping cages for the circus ("Tigers & Ice"). He claims that when the tigers were in heat, they would stand on their hind legs, against their cages as he massaged their vulvas. Then he'd duck out of the way just as they swatted at him. What a way to thank a guy for giving you the big O! and by the way, there is no greater Sacramento issue than getting an arena here for a mere 80% of the cost coming out of our pockets. With all these hip bars sprouting up around K Street, people need somewhere to go AFTER the tailgate party at K Bar! Duh!
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