Tuesday, January 24, 2006

not much to write so i'll pick on heyamoto

I feel so boring. I absolutely cannot compete with drinking King Cobra blood (hope it tastes better than the King Cobra I've had). Hell, I can't even compete with eating a burger wrapped in a donut wrapped in a mystery wrapped in an enigma. Smitty, you should post some pictures.

Speaking of strokes (sorry Luther), did anyone catch that Ariel Sharon article in the New Yorker? That's the most pro-Sharon piece I've ever read. Hell, I almost wanted to sit down with the guy and share a Luther burger! The New Yorker is going to get some letters about that one. Nice how they act like he was a pretty OK guy and only refer to the Palestinian cause as the "Palestinian issue".

Also speaking of Strokes, has anyone heard the new Strokes album?

Live crabs are 3.50 a pound at the Asian food center and they are at their peak of deliciousness. It's about 8 bucks for a giant one.

I was browsing through the Bee columnists, and I found out that Heyamoto has started a new column called (get this) "what's up with that?". You can send her questions. Here's her bio from the site:

Lisa Heyamoto has always regarded her apartment as a poorly equipped rest stop to be visited before and after a night out on the town, which is why she still can't believe she is being paid to go hang out in clubs. She's a recent transplant from Seattle who is always 15 minutes late, won't let anybody forget her birthday, and is one of those people who knows the words to every song but doesn't really know how health insurance works. She has an affinity for cheap beer and salty snacks, and is far too likely to play Def Leppard's "Photograph" on the jukebox if someone hands her a quarter. She would like to live on a boat someday, but can't imagine where she'd put all of her shoes.

If she has already mentioned it, this chick loves shoes! And partying! And she shares the sentiment of all the readers who can't believe she gets paid to write about shoes and partying! Awesome!

17 comments:

Anonymous said...

Pictures will be taken and sent to my friend's meat blog, Meathenge: http://meathenge.com/

Guy said, "You have to do a Monte Luther. Take the Luther Burger, egg wash with a little dust of flour and deep fry it."

I have no idea how a 300 pound Luther Vandross died of a diabetes related stroke at 54. Do you?

Oh yeah, Smiller. Thanks for the nar cd. It's nice.

Anonymous said...

Did someone really write in to What's Up With That? and ask "Is there a Trader Joe's around here?".

No problem, Smitty, And I have to drop another one of those CDs off at your house for a girl named Dawn Pedersen who wants one. She said to drop it with either your or Deeann & Lurch but I only hang with them in cyberspace.

miller

Anonymous said...

Why did she even respond to the Trader Joe's question? What's up with that?

Anonymous said...

Hey, maybe Heyamoto will start being 15 minutes late for her own story deadlines so we won't have to read her -- buh-dum-dum-tssss! Hey, just kidding, Heya. But, I have seen that "What's Up With That?" feature, and it's usually something like, "Joan, 57, from Lincoln asks why there suddenly seems to be lots of theater spotlights shining over downtown Sacramento nearly every Friday and Saturday night. What are they beckoning?" Thanks, Joan. Thanks, Lisa.

Hey, Becky! Wow, great cyber-ID'ing skillz! Indeed, I am that Dave. I thought that I might have to remind you that we bartered a can of peach (?!) beer for a Bonn Lair beer chit at the Finches/Rose Attic Show (Hmmm, I think I got the short end of that deal, but you guys came through for a guy who just needed a beer). You're -- er, your -- blog is right on. I wanted to go to the Christmas party, but had left earlier that day for Portland. I'm sure you all had good ol' Jay Street fun. Thanks again for that invite!

- Dave

Anonymous said...

It seems odd to me that the TJ's seeker was 18. What's an 18 looking for at Trader Joes?

Anonymous said...

Oh, yeah, Becky -- "cheese skirt" at Squeeze Inn?? That sounds gross. What is that? Possibly a good band name, though.

- Dave

Anonymous said...

She's looking for some peace & quiet away from her stupid parents who never let her do ANYTHING! GOD!

miller

Anonymous said...

Smitty, at the Squeeze when they make your burger, they cover the burger with grated cheese while it's on the grill so a bunch of it goes overboard & cooks in to a nice cheese halo around the burger. It's like a saturn burger. It rules.

miller

Anonymous said...

I've been to the Squeeze, but I don't remember the halo. I'll do that to The Luther.

Bill & Karen's house this Thursday.

Skinny picture of Mike: http://www.proberecords.com/images/banana01.jpg

Skinny picture of me: http://www.proberecords.com/images/dave.jpg

Not that M & H are going to eat The Luther. Although they're invited. Did you hear that Connie? Fatten yerselves up for The Coming Apocalypse.

Anonymous said...

I like how daintily Mike is holding that beer. I'm glad he is bigger than that now. His head looks too big for his body in that picture.
You look the same Smitty.

Unfortunately I have practice Thursday so no Luther for me.

-Connie

werenotdeep said...

Can I get a Nar CD? What do I have to do to get a Nar CD?

Anonymous said...

I don't know - nothing? Maybe throw a brew my way sometime. I usually have a few in my bag so just ask me the next time you see me.

miller

werenotdeep said...

Well, okay, but there went your chance to come up with some bizzare list of tasks, reminiscent of a classic greek tale, that I had to accomplish. I'm nuts about that kind of thing.

Anonymous said...

I just got the new Strokes ablum to review. So far, not so good. It sounds like U2 to me. I'll give it a few more listens though.

Stephen Glass said...

Maybe the only thing worse that what's up with Shivat's piece in The New Yorker on Sharon, in which someone gets so caught up in the diea of what a great, historic, symbolic story a person can potentially make (Sharon the warrior becomes Sharon the visionary peacemaker, er, sorta) that they lose all blance on the story and also fall too much in love with the subject (and their swell thesis)...is the trap of writing an overly cutesy tagline/bio like Heyamoto's, one that makes you not want to give her a chance, and who would after that? Oh, you rascals at McClatchy, looking to grab that zesty, youtful audience that can't decide if they like newspapers or not.
I mean, I guess that's what they're doing.

beckler said...

You're right. It's like the author of the sharon piece loved his idea of how to structure the story so much that he forced the facts into that framework. But it will always be Sharon the butcher. Even if he became other things in addition (which is arguable) he can't leave his bloody past behind.

Stephen Glass said...

Dig it. I'm getting tired of this Sharon "story arc" of fierce warrior-to-brave leader that's appearing in this story and everywhere. That whole article didn't really meet their standards, but what with the lambsating of the administration Hertzberg and Hersh do in their pages these days, the editors likely felt like having a piece that might get read with a smile at the Crawford ranch ("golly, what a great story arc"). At least they didn't send Richard Avedon to take three pictures of him. Oh wait; he's dead. Probably why he didn't return their calls...