Friday, February 18, 2005

Complaint department

OK, so on to some complaints:

Why oh why oh why is the beer selection at Safeway so shitty? I'm talking about the new Safeway, I don't go to the old Safeway anymore. It's so, well, old. Sometimes when I am craving a beer I stand in that aisle for five minutes or more, desperately scanning up and down and back and forth, incredulous that there is not one single tasty and affordable beer. And now they got rid of their 22s, which I would always settle for when I gave up on a good sixer. No, I don't want Fat Tire Ale. I don't want woodchuck ale or kangaroo jack lager or whatever the fuck you are offering. I don't want any of the five kinds of Sierra Nevada. Just pick one they are all bitter as fuck why do you need so many kinds? I don't want to pay nine dollars for Anchor Steam. Where do they get off charging over 7 bucks for Negra Modelo? Why no cheap Czech beer? Waaayyy overpriced and not that good Pilsner Urquell doesn't do it for me. Do you really need to take up so much space with cases of Coors Light? Can't you move them over a little bit and squeeze in some good, semi-cheap beer? The only thing they have that is OK is bottles of Pabst, but that's not what I want for 1 or 2 good beers with dinner. I'm just going to have to start buying more five dollar six packs of Staropramen at Trader Joes.

Has anyone noticed that the Bomb sucks now? It is no different from KSFM anymore. This makes me sad. It used to be that I would leave the dial on the Bomb and then very occasionally be forced to turn it to 102.5 when a commercial was on or something. The Bomb would always be playing a good song, either an oldie or some bay area hip-hop or something, and when I turned to KSFM it would always be playing some crap like Eminem or Ashanti. Now they are always both playing some crap like Eminem or Ashanti. This makes sense, because the Bomb is no longer independently owned. It's owned by a corporation. I guess I shouldn't cling to the idea that it's any better. Now Doug Banks is on 102 instead of the Bomb. The Bomb canceled the Tom Joyner morning show, which I know makes a certain person very sad. And there is that whole thing where the Bomb called the FCC on the underground downtown hip-hop station. As someone pointed out to a letter in the SN&R, this is funny considering that if you live between T and 1st ave and about 10th street to 28th, the Bomb bleeds into every other radio station and will come in on your VCR, your metal fence, and even the fillings in your teeth if you're unlucky. That must be some kind of FCC violation!

One more complaint. It is about camellias. They are in full bloom right now. Yes, their blooms are beautiful. I saw one yesterday that was newly planted in that house near Dave Smith's old place (you know, the giant Victorian that has been completely remodeled with an ugly new iron fence and it's always creepily empty and you can see a huge crystal chandelier throught the windows, Heather knows the one) that stopped me in my tracks. It started out deep pink at the bottom and then faded up to the lightest pink at the top. My complaint is what happens when the blooms decay. They turn brown and either fall on the tree and become a stinky, slippery, rotten mess or most of them just stay on the bush and decay forever. Get ahold of yourself camellia bush, you are covered in garbage. Have some self respect. I don't know what happens to other flowers when the blooms decay, but I have never noticed them staying on there and rotting. Ask that rose bush next to you what it does and do that.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

oh, what I'd give to see a flower in bloom...

-michele

Anonymous said...

Man, I was trying to mix a song down on to my stereo the other day & I couldn't cuz the Bomb was audibly coming through my speakers. And that's up on 37th & J.
Also, yes, Safeway beer selection is so fucking bland! The low-rent Alhambra Safeway's selection is only, like, 10% better than the new museum Safeway. Plus, all the beer prices are through the roof. And don't buy beer on club card because they almost only put it on sale when it's going bad. I'm a regular brew professor over here.
miller

leon said...

If you want highbrow beer, the A&P seems the place to go now-a-days. I'm serious!

Anonymous said...

Becky, I'm telling you:
Old Tavern. A pint of Anchor steam for $2.50! That's 16oz at about 16 cents per ounce! As opposed to a six-pack for $7.50 (72 oz) at about 11 cents per ounce. OK, maybe not such a great deal...but can you get the OT ambience at home?

--long time co-worker, first time commenter

Anonymous said...

I do know that house! When are they going to put some people in there? I have my suspicions that they are going to open it as a B&B. They'll be sorry when they have Alpha Bum sleeping under their stairs and crapping on their lawn. Yes, camellia flowers are so gross when they are done blooming. There's no single petal delicately falling to the ground to be swept away in a gentle spring breeze. The whole thing just drops at once like a big pink turd (For some reason I have this feeling that Miller will cringe at the word turd.)
Michele, the almond trees are nearing full bloom!
A&P does rule for beer selection.

Heather

Anonymous said...

I do know that house! When are they going to put some people in there? I have my suspicions that they are going to open it as a B&B. They'll be sorry when they have Alpha Bum sleeping under their stairs and crapping on their lawn. Yes, camellia flowers are so gross when they are done blooming. There's no single petal delicately falling to the ground to be swept away in a gentle spring breeze. The whole thing just drops at once like a big pink turd (For some reason I have this feeling that Miller will cringe at the word turd.)
Michele, the almond trees are nearing full bloom!
A&P does rule for beer selection.

Heather

Anonymous said...

the dreaded double post. I just wanted Miller to cringe more.

beckler said...

The dreaded double post is why I laughed so hard when Davey did it and then posted "so nice I had to say it twice"
There was a plant in the window at that house last night. I think. It was dark. Or maybe it was a ghost plant of a plant that died in that house long ago.