I hope the tweakers who stole my front and back tires last night have a great time with the money they got for them. I hope they got a really good deal on crank and that it wasn't cut with too much laxative or whatever. I hope that it led to some really good tooth grinding sessions, maybe so good that a tooth or two falls out. Maybe they will have some really good mumbling and yelling episodes or even make some cool tweaker art. Or maybe the large quantity of crank will just give them the energy to go out and steal lots more bike tires. I think Elton John refers to that as "The Circle of Life". I certainly don't begrudge them the money. I just admire the balls it took to steal them both at eight at night out from under an open window that all of us were sitting next to, talking and laughing and drinking wine. Did the tweaker pause for a minute and listen to our pleasant conversation and wish, just for a fleeting instant, that he wasn't a drug addicted piece of shit who steals things from people? Maybe, I'll never know. If I could ask him one question, it would be "why is it that if I park my bike one single block away that I can even leave it outside overnight (which I've done by accident when I forget it's out there) and you won't touch it? What is it about this block (11th and T) that makes it so attractive for you to instantly steal my tires?"****
So, long story short I probably need a new bike. Last time when just my back tire got stolen the folksy old guy at College Cyclery was pushing pretty hard for me to just get a new bike and made me feel stupid for wanting to fix mine. It would need both tires and a full tune-up and new brakes. I want a bike that's light and fast, not a cruiser, and it has to have a pretty big frame cuz I'm tall. Can anyone help me out? Or where should I buy one? Or, if I do decide to just fix mine cuz I really like it, where should I take it? And I don't want to buy a bike at that place on Franklin cuz I think they buy stolen bikes. I'm gonna look on Craigslist today, too.
In more neighborhood crime news, there are four dudes robbing men on the southside. There have been four robberies in that area and one of the robberies happened wednesday on my block, which I read in the Bee and which is news to me. They've just threatened to kick the guys asses, they don't have any weapons. They jump out of a red sports car. Hopefully, now that it's in the paper these guys will knock it off because randomly robbing people, especially people in my neighborhood and then splitting it four ways could no way have netted them more than like 50 bucks each. So now that they know the cops are onto them I would think they would stop.
****I know this diatribe was harsh and I don't actually think any human being is a piece of shit besides obvious people like George Bush.