Friday, July 17, 2009

Lady "dayrage"

I'm manning the blog today as heckasac participates in the lady dayrage. This post will serve to chronicle the ladies' progress via text message as they pet kittens, watch "The Piano", eat chocolate and go shoe shopping - oh, yes, and drink the occasional fruity drink in an attempt to get buzzed. Good luck on your transitional journey ladies!

-miller

29 comments:

Anonymous said...

I am doing the important pre-dayrage moisturizing right now!

gbomb

Anonymous said...

Moisturaging!

Jeff M. said...

Miller, as one funny man to another, I bow before you, sir. You crack me up.

Anonymous said...

They are gonna drink sooooooo many appletinis!

fft said...

i recommend drinking a greyhound. very ladyrage.

Anonymous said...

I just helped a lady get her bike out of her car so that she could meet other ladies at the lady rage. Being a gentlemen, I offered to give her some secret tapes to pop into the boombox on the rage, you know, in between wine coolers or something. Imagine my horror when she told me there was no boombox, thus no Dead tapes, nor Creedence, Springsteen, Mellencamp, or (gasp!) Replacements. Well, rest assured, gentlemen, I politely informed her that a rage without a Replacements cassette is no rage at all. I then said "Good day!" and wished her Godspeed to the Monkeybar!

Amateurs!

-heckamax

Anonymous said...

Excuse the delay here - I was in a meeting. But we have some texts!

11:02 Bernardo's 2 egg breakfast and coffee. Tall boy hidden in bike basket.

11:04 Bloody mary at Bernardo.

11:26 We're talking about cats.

More to come.

-miller

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Anonymous said...

We have 2 entries from 11:57. The ladies are working overtime to make it appear as though they're raging!

From Heckasac: "Strawberry Smirnoff rage"

Grom G balls: "PBR on ice in your Orval glass".

Hands off my Orval glass wench!

-miller

PS: I had to delete my previous comment due to to mis-spelling "off". I always have trouble with big words like that.

Anonymous said...

12:13 "Strawberry Smirnoff on ice in your Orval glass."

It appears that my polite request has been ignored, however, I should point out that this is not the world's largest glass by any stretch & by my calculations, allowing for the ice, there is roughly 5 oz of Smirnoff Ice being consumed. Oh yes, in case you were assuming that they were talking about straight Smirnoff, you would be mistaken. This 6 pack of Smirnoff Ice was purchased when A&P Liquor reported to Heckasac that wine coolers were no longer made.

-miller

Anonymous said...

12:39: "Tomorrow - Sat, July 18 @ Harlow's: special early show with Shannon Curtis - 7pm!!! with Bryn Loosely - doors @ 6pm - $8 adv (harlows.com)/ 410 @ door - all ages"

Wait, Jer Per is on the lady dayrage?!

-miller

Anonymous said...

12:47 "gayrage at the merc"

Anonymous said...

12:51 "these Shirley Temple's are SOOOOO strong"

Anonymous said...

1:31 "Mamas and papas on the patio at the merc. Liv has joined"

It's kind of like how we were listening to the Dead on the back patio of Simon's. Except we had a boombox & were smoking weed.

-miller

Anonymous said...

Heckamax, apparently your sister - we'll call her Ms "I'm willing to start raging when the sun rises" Maxwell - has just joined the dayrage at 2:00. This brings the lady dayrage total to six ladies. And Jer Per of course.

-miller

Anonymous said...

I've heard they are going to Whiskey Wild's. Finally! A move I approve of! Hope Whiskey Wild's Zima supply is well stocked.

-Heckamax

Anonymous said...

Just in!

2:10 "we are the only people at whiskey wild"

Maxwell, how have we overlooked whiskey wild on the real dayrage? How?! A point for the ladies.

-miller

Anonymous said...

2:11 "jana & guphy dancing on bar"

I call bullshit on that one!

-miller

Anonymous said...

I am totally contemplating going "undercover" to Whiskey Wild -- with a snowcone.

-heckamax

PS Do you think that "guphy and jana dancing on the bar" is code for "we're talking about our favorite chapter in Twilight"? It's actually kind of sad when you think about it.

PSS my word verification is "nonag". Weird, huh?

Anonymous said...

Very weird.

Hey, mine is "free&easy"

-miller

Anonymous said...

The ladyrage has officially entered Little Yuba for PBR Lights.

Anonymous said...

3:27 "Jarritos! Katy got a miller chill. Jana got a bud light lime"

Hmmm, that's two of the six ladies. Maybe the others are taking a little break...

-miller

Anonymous said...

Those PBR Lights are mine! I left them at Madeline's house! If a man's PBR Lights that he left at his sister's house aren't sacred, then what is? Why, this is a low blow, even for the ladyrage!

Curse you, ladyrage!

-heckamax

Anonymous said...

4:01: "bought porn at l'amour shop"

Anonymous said...

The dayrage has left the grid! Currently "drinking" at the Pocket Club.

-miller

Anonymous said...

4:42 "old guy bought liv a beer"

Foster, I'd get over to the Pocket Club quick if I were you! Or wait, maybe you're already there & you just bought Liv a beer.

-miller

Anonymous said...

4:43 "24 oz pabsts for $2.75"

I like the sound of this Pocket Club....

-miller

Anonymous said...

As 5:00 rapidly approaches, the dayrage turns in to the boring ol' nightrage & our correspondence must come to an end. I think we can all agree that if they hadn't just been making all of this up, it would've been a hell of a rage.

To the Pocket Club!

-miller

Anonymous said...

anecdote apropos of nothing:

am in liberia for two weeks doing a short project. last night i was all coked up with this lebanese car dealer who's been living here for years. he asked me where I'm from, and I'm like, "Sacramento". he goes "hey, Sacto!" I'm like, "Dude how does a Lebanese guy in Liberia know that it's called Sacto?" He goes, "Man the Kings are owned by Lebanese brothers. Everyone in Lebanon knows about Sacto."

-chapstick