There. I've just succesfully changed Becky's password & she can no longer post. I've taken her blog hostage. I've been swept up in hostage fever! I tried to get my own blog but I didn't pass the stringent requirement process. Not just anyone can get one of these you know. Imagine if anybody who wanted a blog was allowed to have one. Why, the internet would be overrun with them! A quick Google search for 'blog' only returned 55, 800,000 matches.
So, my loyal readership, let's get acquainted. I'll begin by telling you something somewhat personal & embarassing about myself. Yesterday I went to Joe Sun & bought some underwear. My favorite part about buying underwear there is that before they finalize the sale, they inform you that once you open it, you can't return it. This conjures up wonderful scenarios of people trying to return old, dirty underwear. "But I ain't even worn it!" etc. The fact that Joe Sun is on the K Street mall makes these scenarios that much more ripe. I laugh, assuring the lady that I won't be doing any such thing. But the joke was on me! I got home, opened them, & they were 4 sizes smaller than the size advertised on the package. (the fact that I'm talking about underwear is making the word 'package' sound nastier than it should) So now I'm going back at lunch today & attempting to return them. Fortunately I struck up a little playful reparte with the counter lady so maybe she'll cut me a break. She was criticizing my shoulder bag for being too worn out. She made a hilarious joke about how, if I put the underwear in my bag, the bag would fall apart. Vixen!! "Hey, I got my dollar's worth out of it!", I fire back. Then I got her respect as a smart shopper. That's right lady, I could've bought 6 thrift store shoulder bags for the price of one package (he he) of your wrong-sized pants. I love that the English call underwear 'pants'! It's only so they can sound all English by calling pants 'trousers'. Also, I like the slang 'pants' for something that's crappy. This new Jackie Green CD is PANTS! There's that new Feeling song with the word 'trousers' in it. I really like it but I don't know what it's called so I have to yell "Trousers!" when I want to hear it. At least I'm not yelling 'pants!'. Does James really refer to his pants as trousers? "Danny, where are my trousers??!".
I'm going to Joe Sun now.
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Another weird thing about the British is that they call their corduroy pants "jeans." Whenever Matt is talking about his "jeans", I have to ask him if he is referring to corduroy pants or denim. This has actually sparked a couple debates which usually end in him stating something like: "besides, if you were going to call them anything different, you would call them 'corduroy trousers', not 'pants'; 'pants' are underwear." Sheesh. I've stopped trying to see the logic in all the nonsensical monickers for fear that it will just get my knickers in a bunch.
-Alice
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